Tuesday, March 20, 2012

"Pity lay"

The phrase as I understand it refers to a situation whereby one has sex with a person that they would not otherwise be inclined to grant sexual favors but does so out of a sense of pity for how bad the recipient seems to feel. Perhaps it's an otherwise platonic friend who's feeling really down on life, or an ex-lover who needs some serious cheering up, but for whatever reason you think some sexual attention is just what they need to help alleviate their blues. I'm not sure where or when I first heard the term, but once I learned that the possibility existed it was not beneath me to use it to my advantage - if being sad and despondent is going to get me laid, I can be as pathetic as I need to be.

I'm telling you this now because last night I did something I have never done before - I gave someone a (metaphorical) pity lay. Who knew I could be so sensitive and sympathetic to someone else's needs?

My favorite radio station, WMPG, is having a pledge week ("Begathon" they call it) to raise funds for their operating expenses, and I have already contributed generously - probably more than I can afford, to be honest. So as I listen to the DJ's, all of whom I love, making their pitches for listeners to call in to donate I can smugly think I don't need to call because I have already done more than my part.

That changed last night while I was listening to Suzanne host her Red, White and Blues show. She was making all the usual pitches for listener contributions, giving out the number to call and describing the various incentives, depending on how much you donated - and she was playing some smokin' hot blues, as she always does. Of the six volunteers who host blues programs in this time slot, she is my favorite because of the passion she brings to the show. But things seemed not to be going well for her donation-wise.

As the show progressed Suzanne became increasingly desperate for callers - she apparently had set ambitious expectations for herself in terms of the number of callers and the dollars pledged, and it seems she was coming up short in both categories. Near the end of the two hour program she was practically begging for callers, and I succumbed. I didn't pledge a lot of money but I hope my call made her feel a little better about herself - that's what a "pity lay" is supposed to do, right? I hope it was as good for her as it was for me.

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